Are you ready to make your relationship? It’s time to mend your broken partnership.
Sometimes, we are not ready to make the changes we really want and need to until we hit a tipping point in our broken relationships.
The tipping point comes when, without a shadow of a doubt it becomes clear to you, that the pain of your relationship staying the same is too great and you are ready and willing to face your fears.
You are ready to do whatever it takes to get back on track.
These 7-Steps will help lead you and partner back on the path to your own great life with great sex !
1. Starting today let go of all behaviors that keep you from your partner.
In order for you both to know what’s possible, you have to be willing to leave behind all behaviors and patterns that keep you moving away. Yes, I know you learned to do these things because you don’t believe your partner can meet your needs.
I also know, these self-soothing and protective behaviors are a block to ever getting those needs met in your relationship. The time is now to stop the screaming matches, silent treatments and all other behaviors that keep you from experiencing the life you want and deserve.
2. Put the “hot” topics in your marriage on the back burner.
Focusing on the negative…what you don’t have, won’t get, or fear will happen, won’t serve you. You already know in your own experience that focusing on your issues, like a laser light beam, doesn’t make them go away or improve.
The reality is that focus becomes a high-voltage spotlight and becomes the only thing you see. Focus on the negative and I assure you more negative will come. This is the law of attraction and it applies to your relationship.
3. Make room to remember and notice what drew you to your partner.
Bring back the images, memories and stories. Allow yourself to connect with the effortless connection and flow of energy you felt with your partner in the beginning of your relationship.
There is no accident about the chemistry that drew you to one another. You already know in your own experience that it’s not everyday that you feel drawn to someone in the way you were to your partner. It’s why so many love songs say things like, I feel I’d always known you from the minute I met you.
There truly are signals that we pick up on and draw us to those whom we have the most connection and the potential for the greatest growth (once you learn how to get on the other side of the hot or cold war that has hijacked your relationship).
Reconnect to the experience of your relationship at it’s best to know exactly what you are fighting for.
4. Notice, name and let go of all the past stories and fears that hold you back.
They don’t serve you now. Doing the same thing over and over, holding grudges, reacting the same way to disappointment and frustration has not and will not help you get what you most desire.
Take a break. Slow all emotion down to consciously and intentionally show up in your relationship with the best of yourself; the parts of you that drew your partner to you in the first place. Don’t allow your partner to bring you down or lower your own standards.
It’s incredibly common (in fact more the rule than the exception) that when all of a sudden you show up differently in your relationship, your partner can’t receive the best of you or believe you have changed.
This is where things fall apart for most couples . Don’t let this happen to you. Give the best of yourself without expectation. Give because it feels right, and you know the value of how it feels to show up with your loving, generous and openhearted self.
In time, and with consistency, your partner will be able to receive you. They too have the responsibility and commitment to being their best self.
5. Create new relationship habits, expressing appreciation, and showing caring behaviors, throwing in surprises.
Think of your relationship like a garden or great dinner and put in all of the ingredients that you know make it great. Allow yourself to receive the gifts of these new habits. It’s time you allow them in. This is also a good time to be reminded of the Platinum Rule. Do for your partner the things that would give them pleasure.
Get to know your partner’s love language (from Gary Chapman’s great book, the 5 are: gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service and physical touch). Be generous in the love language your partner can most easily feel and receive.
6. Make room to notice all of the positive things about your life, your partner, your family, and your friends.
Bring your attention consciously to the small things and moments that you cherish. John Gottman an internationally renowned marriage researcher recommends the 5 to 1 Rule.
For every negative thing you pay attention to, take time to consider and notice 5 other things that feel good and are also true in this moment.
7. Know this journey is hard.
Yes, I said it. GO big or go home! Life is not easy, especially when you want to experience something truly worthwhile. Truly ask yourself, what am I committed to? My personal pain/frustration or the marriage of your dreams? There are no fairy tales other than the ones we consciously create and show up for.
Make your life extraordinary…you get one life. Make yours GREAT!
If you are interested in learning more about our Re-Kindle Your Desire & Bring Sexy Back Program – we are running an amazing offer right now. Check it out at: