Tag Archives: LoveLife

This is Why I Hate Chris Brown And His Jokes


I hate that people are still making jokes about Chris Brown and Rihanna. I hate that I have to pretend to laugh at them and I hate that I don’t have the balls to slap them and tell them to shut the fuck up. Whenever I hear an ignorant joke or comment about the couple, I hate that I can’t tell them my story and make them understand what they are joking about.

I first met Tom when I was 15. I was young and stupid, and thought that it was love at first sight. I had a boyfriend at the time, but Tom and I texted each other innocently until I eventually broke up with my boyfriend. A few months later, Tom asked me to be his girlfriend and I was the happiest girl in the world.

The first two weeks of our relationship were a whirlwind. I had never felt so loved, so wanted, so needed. We shared all of our deepest secrets, he confided in me about his abusive mother and I told him all of my hopes, dreams and insecurities. He thought I was perfect and I knew that we were in love. One night, he was driving me home and one of the speakers in his car stopped working. This was the first time he hit me, and the moment when I lost everything I knew about myself. At first he punched my arm and I thought he was just being playful, so I giggled until he hit me again and pushed my head into the side of his car. “Don’t fucking laugh at me. Fucking cunt.” I was in shock. I wasn’t even upset, I was just numb. I had never felt such violent hatred, let alone from somebody who was supposed to love me, somebody who I loved so deeply. We sat in silence for the rest of the drive until we were at my house — he kissed me goodbye and told me he’d see me soon.

I couldn’t sleep that night. I sat in bed repeating the moment over and over again. What had I done that made him so mad? He kissed me goodbye so he must not be mad anymore, right? I made hundreds of excuses for him. He had grown up with an abusive mother, so somehow I decided this made his actions justifiable. That day was the just the beginning of a horrifyingly abusive relationship. I spent every day for the next year trying to be whatever he wanted me to be. We could spend hours of happiness together until something flipped a switch in his head and he went from a beautiful, loving man to an angry, violent monster. I had no idea who I was anymore – my identity revolved around being Tom’s girlfriend.

Tom was both emotionally and physically abusive. He convinced me that I was disgusting, that nobody would ever love me and I was lucky that he would even look at me. He convinced me that my family hated me and since I believed this, it became true as I intentionally strained my relationship with them. He had another girlfriend, but somehow he convinced me that I was the most important and that she didn’t matter. He would make me stand in the bathroom with him while he showered because I was a “whore” and he couldn’t trust me to be alone with his friends. He forced me to prove my love to him through sex. If I didn’t, he would claim that I was cheating on him and would describe in detail how he would make me watch as he killed whoever I was sleeping with and then would kill me after. Throughout all of this, I wasn’t scared or sad, I was completely numb. My emotions didn’t matter anymore all that mattered was making Tom happy. When Tom was happy, he loved me and when Tom loved me, I was happy.

One day, I was with Tom, his friend, my sister, and my best friend. Tom wanted me to go upstairs and grab him a glass of water. He was in a good mood so I laughed and said no way get it yourself. I saw the switch, something that I had become so accustomed to but that nobody else recognized. He held me down in front of everybody and dick slapped me on my face. My sister and my best friend watched and did NOTHING. Looking back, I’m sure they thought it was a joke, but I was humiliated and disgusted. This moment solidified the fact that my family/friends didn’t care about me and that I was on my own — except for Tom.

I convinced myself that I couldn’t break up with him because I was scared for my physical safety, but this was the least of my worries. I had been told so many times that I was a worthless piece of shit from somebody that I cared so deeply about that I truly believed it and I truly believed that he was the only person in the world who would ever care about me.

When I finally decided to break up with him, we had been at his friend’s apartment and he had just gotten off the phone with his other girlfriend. I told him that I was leaving and that I couldn’t do this anymore. Again, I saw the switch turn and he became the monster again. He slapped me, grabbed my hair, dragged me out in the living room and proceeded to beat me and rape me in front of five of his closest friends. Nobody even tried to stop him. At this point, I had fully accepted and welcomed the thought of dying. I thought that he was going to kill me in that living room and I was looking forward to it. Instead, he pulled me up and drove me home. I wish I had been brave enough to tell somebody and to go to the police, but at the time, I fully believed that this was my fault and was too humiliated to tell anybody.

After we broke up, he called and texted me every single day for four months. It was a constant reminder of what had happened to me. The messages ranged from telling me how much he loved and missed me, to calling me the disgusting whore that he had always known I was, to threatening to kill me. Eventually I made up an excuse to tell my parents why I wanted to change my number, but he found it less than a month later.

I began to hate my family and my friends for not helping me through this. Even though I had never told them, I blamed them for not realizing that something was wrong. I hated everything – especially myself. Every time I would look in the mirror I would either cry or become infuriated with how disgusting I was. I couldn’t be alone in a room with a man for almost six months. The first time I had sex with somebody after the incident, I had a complete emotional breakdown and almost killed myself. I decided to move because I couldn’t go anywhere without being terrified that I would run into him or his friends.

It’s been six years and I still have nightmares about him every night. I still hate cuddling because sometimes the thought of somebody touching me literally makes me want to vomit. I haven’t been able to have a normal relationship because I’m incapable of explaining what I have been through. How can I explain to a boyfriend that sometimes when we have sex, I feel like I’m being raped all over again? That I can’t sleep in the same bed as him because I wake up horrified from my nightmares? That I can’t fight with him because if he starts to yell I revert to the numb, speechless girl that I was with Tom?

So no, Chris Brown jokes don’t make me mad. The jokes make me so sad because people don’t even realize what they are joking about. They have no idea how one violent moment can change you from a happy, loving teenager to an empty shell of a human. It took a wonderful friend to hold my hand and help me recover from this relationship. I honestly believe that I owe him my life. I have only told this story to four people – and even when I do I can’t make the right words come out of my mouth to make them fully comprehend what I went through.

If I hadn’t heard so many jokes about abuse and hadn’t heard so many people ask “well what did she do to deserve it?”, I like to think that I could have come forward with my story a long time ago. Tom is now in prison for almost killing another girl. I blame myself everyday for not putting him in prison sooner. I could have saved this girl the pain and horror, but I was a coward. I’m thrilled that conversations about rape have begun to turn away from victim blaming, but now it’s time to do the same with abuse. Please, no more Chris Brown jokes.

By Nanette Oiboh

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Three Pieces Of Marriage Advice You Should Actually Listen To


Inside most of us is the yearning desire to find that one person with whom we can spend the rest of our lives. We long to grow old with someone, to sit in our rocking chairs on the porch when we are frail and gray, yelling at all the neighborhood kids to stay the hell off of our lawn. Yes, this is the dream. But, it doesn’t always come easily. Even once you’ve found the person who you will vow to stay with in sickness and in health, things aren’t always smooth sailing. This is the marriage relationship advice they always forget to tell you about. This isn’t to say that marriage is bad — it can be bad, it can be good, or it can be teetering somewhere in the middle.

In lots of ways, marriage is applicable to those annoyingly inspirational sayings you always find on t-shirts: it’s what you make of it. Still, going into a marriage and expecting nothing but bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens is unrealistic. Sometimes the warm woolen mittens have holes and you secretly want to grab the bright copper kettle and bash your spouse over the head. In other words, marriage has its ups and down. But, being prepared for this is marriage relationship advice that will benefit you. So, as you saunter down the aisle into Mr. and Mrs. land, remember:

1. Marriage is hard : Marriage is hard, and no, not just in the bedroom (sorry, fellas). It basically requires you to live sixty or seventy years with one person, accepting their faults and hoping they accept yours. There are times you’ll be mad at each other and times where you may even look at your wedding day like you look at the day you tried to drink a gallon of milk in under one hour: you’ll regret it. But, there will also be times of fun, excitement, and utter happiness. So, if you remember one piece of marriage relationship advice, remember this: no one ever said marriage would be easy. They only said it would be worth it.

2. Marriage takes sacrifice: Saying that marriage takes sacrifice isn’t exactly “stop the presses, breaking news”; most people are aware of this. But, what they might not be aware of is that both parties should sacrifice as equally as possible. Sacrificing in marriage isn’t the problem — most things in life take sacrifice. But, when one partner sacrifices as often as a pitcher bunting with a runner on first and the other partner sacrifices almost never, you run into problems. This isn’t to say there needs to be a tally (one sacrifice for me, one for you), but it should be as fair as possible. Good marriage relationship advice is to be cognizant of who is sacrificing more (or making the bigger sacrifices) and put forth an effort to even things out.

3. Marriage changes things, but that’s okay : If you’ve dated your partner for years, lived with them since a Republican was in office, and settled into your routine (work, dinner, “Dancing with the Stars”), it’s hard to believe that marriage will change things that much. Yet, it’s not so much marriage. Making it legal via a piece of paper and three hundred of your best friends doesn’t automatically lead to drastic alterations. Rather, it’s time that changes things. While your spouse may have been totally into sex in their mid-twenties, they might not be as much fifteen years later. While your partner may have always wanted to go out and do things, they may become content to sit at home and chill.

While the both of you may have once talked each other’s ears off, you may now notice more silence fills the room. Time marches, and typically that march is towards change. But, it’s important to remember that change isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Change can be good, exciting, — or if your spouse decides they no longer hold the cast of “Jersey Shore” as their personal heroes — even something you embrace with open arms and sighs of relief.

By Stefan

Inside most of us is the yearning desire to find that one person with whom we can spend the rest of our lives. We long to grow old with someone, to sit in our rocking chairs on the porch when we are frail and gray, yelling at all the neighborhood kids to stay the hell off of our lawn. Yes, this is the dream. But, it doesn’t always come easily. Even once you’ve found the person who you will vow to stay with in sickness and in health, things aren’t always smooth sailing. This is the marriage relationship advice they always forget to tell you about. This isn’t to say that marriage is bad — it can be bad, it can be good, or it can be teetering somewhere in the middle.

In lots of ways, marriage is applicable to those annoyingly inspirational sayings you always find on t-shirts: it’s what you make of it. Still, going into a marriage and expecting nothing but bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens is unrealistic. Sometimes the warm woolen mittens have holes and you secretly want to grab the bright copper kettle and bash your spouse over the head. In other words, marriage has its ups and down. But, being prepared for this is marriage relationship advice that will benefit you. So, as you saunter down the aisle into Mr. and Mrs. land, remember:

1. Marriage is hard : Marriage is hard, and no, not just in the bedroom (sorry, fellas). It basically requires you to live sixty or seventy years with one person, accepting their faults and hoping they accept yours. There are times you’ll be mad at each other and times where you may even look at your wedding day like you look at the day you tried to drink a gallon of milk in under one hour: you’ll regret it. But, there will also be times of fun, excitement, and utter happiness. So, if you remember one piece of marriage relationship advice, remember this: no one ever said marriage would be easy. They only said it would be worth it.

2. Marriage takes sacrifice: Saying that marriage takes sacrifice isn’t exactly “stop the presses, breaking news”; most people are aware of this. But, what they might not be aware of is that both parties should sacrifice as equally as possible. Sacrificing in marriage isn’t the problem — most things in life take sacrifice. But, when one partner sacrifices as often as a pitcher bunting with a runner on first and the other partner sacrifices almost never, you run into problems. This isn’t to say there needs to be a tally (one sacrifice for me, one for you), but it should be as fair as possible. Good marriage relationship advice is to be cognizant of who is sacrificing more (or making the bigger sacrifices) and put forth an effort to even things out.

3. Marriage changes things, but that’s okay : If you’ve dated your partner for years, lived with them since a Republican was in office, and settled into your routine (work, dinner, “Dancing with the Stars”), it’s hard to believe that marriage will change things that much. Yet, it’s not so much marriage. Making it legal via a piece of paper and three hundred of your best friends doesn’t automatically lead to drastic alterations. Rather, it’s time that changes things. While your spouse may have been totally into sex in their mid-twenties, they might not be as much fifteen years later. While your partner may have always wanted to go out and do things, they may become content to sit at home and chill.

While the both of you may have once talked each other’s ears off, you may now notice more silence fills the room. Time marches, and typically that march is towards change. But, it’s important to remember that change isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Change can be good, exciting, — or if your spouse decides they no longer hold the cast of “Jersey Shore” as their personal heroes — even something you embrace with open arms and sighs of relief.

By Stefan

If Your Guy Does These 16 Things, Congrats! He’s A True Gentleman


It’s time to celebrate the grown-up men who know how to treat a woman.

I love Rhett Butler. No, not Gerard. Rhett. In fact, I feel that every man and woman on the planet should be made to watch Gone With The Wind at least twice, if only to teach men how to be men and women how to separate them from the boys.

And if you are dating in the here and now, you know where the boys are: on Tinder, on Match, on the street, making vulgar statements about what they’d like to do with you and where. They’re in your phone texting sexual innuendos before they know your last name and asking to “hang out” because they’re terrified of committing to the idea of a proper date.

Rhett Butler would not do any of this. Rhett was a man in control of himself. He dressed and spoke well, loved better, and had a great sense of humor, sometimes of questionable taste. He was unafraid to speak his mind, stand his ground, fall wildly in love, and show his love (and fight for it, too).

Now, before you remind me that I’m speaking about a fictional character, I’ll let you in on a little secret: I was raised by a man who lived this way and know a few men who live this way now. And make no mistake: they do wonderfully with women.

As a woman, there’s nothing better than being in the presence of a man who relishes in his masculinity in a way that doesn’t involve the obvious chest-pounding and cat-calling, but the confident reserve of a gentleman.

Before you accuse me of hating men, let me be clear: I love more things about men than I can put into one article. This is not about finding female empowerment though man-bashing. Quite the opposite, actually. It’s a celebration of the grown-up man’s man who knows how to treat a woman.

What does this man look like? Here are 16 signs he’s a gentleman.

1. He’s hygienic, but cleans his nails and trims his nose hairs outside of a nail salon.

Think about it: Would Hemingway or a gladiator be getting his nails buffed? Methinks not.

2. He can balance both swag and sophistication, and a career and a personal life without too many proverbial exclamation points.

And certainly not multiple ones in a text message. No, no, no.

3. He reserves his “LOL” for actual laughter, which he exudes out loud and often.

4. He isn’t looking to play “pen pal” with you through your iPhone.

Because he knows that all text and no play makes Johnny a very dull boy.

5. When he’s interested in a woman, he doesn’t wait three days to call her.

But he does actually call her, and when he does, he asks her out for dinner, makes reservations, picks a great bottle of wine (because he knows how to) and then makes sure she gets home safely.

6. If he wants to see her again, he lets her know.

And if he doesn’t, he politely lets her know that it was a pleasure to spend time with her, even if it wasn’t. He does, however, let her know gently and firmly enough that he’s not interested so she doesn’t waste her time thinking it might become something it won’t.

7. He reads actual books and newspapers.

He holds opinions on everything from scotch pairings to world events, all while understanding that not all of his opinions are facts and that not everyone has to agree with him in order for him to maintain his relationships or his manhood.

In fact, he enjoys it when you don’t agree with him because it means he gets to indulge you in a good debate or leave you thinking a little bit harder about things than when you sat down in front of him.

8. He opens doors and takes coats.

Not because he feels a woman is weak, but because he’s strong enough to show that he cares about the comfort of those around him .

9. He might want to get into a woman’s bed, but he’s also interested in getting into her head.

Experience has shown him that seduction is a delicate dance, and the man who resides in her mind has conquered every other part of her.

10. He appreciates a woman who shows she cares for him, but he isn’t interested in being courted.

He enjoys the taking the lead in courting and doesn’t need to be “chased” because he’s in desperate need of an ego stroke. He also won’t play “puppy dog” to a woman who takes advantage of this.

11. He doesn’t look to be anyone’s father or savior.

And he doesn’t pretend to be the leading man in any woman’s fairy tale. He’s just a man looking for a partner who can slay her own dragons, pay her own bills and explore the world alongside him.

12. He looks for a woman who doesn’t need him but wants him.

Not for money or the happiness or a baby or a safety net, but solely for who he is.

13. He has a career, a hobby, a family of close friends and a favorite way to have his steak prepared.

He isn’t the least bit intimidated when the woman in front of him shares these qualities; quite the contrary, it makes him want her more.

14. He has a strong understanding of his own character and convictions, what he values and what he doesn’t.

He’s a man who is honest with himself about himself, and therefore is OK being honest with those around him.

15. He takes as much pride in the way he treats women as he does his job and the way he looks.

16. He’s not the bad boy, a good boy, or a boy at all — he’s a man.

A leading man, and he’s looking not for a good girl, but a great woman. One who shares all of the solid qualities that he brings to the table, and perhaps, can teach him something along the way.

He’s willing to wait and work for this woman, to fight for her, and will gladly hold out for her as long as he needs to. But when she comes along, he doesn’t sit on the fence; he’s smart enough to know when he’s gotten damned lucky. And when she finds him and knows all the signs he’s a gentleman , she should be smart enough to know the same.

Are you in the right relationship? Check out the video below to find out for sure:

By

Amaefula Ikeagwuchi Samuel

This Is The News No Woman Wants To Ever Hear


A year ago, almost to the day, I went to the doctor for a scheduled check-up. Autumn’s cold had turned the sky grey and the sun barely peaked out from behind the clouds. It was also days before I was to hit the runway for Fashion Week and I was ecstatic with anticipation.

The swirling pain and confusion that came that morning nearly knocked me off my feet.

“Lift up your left arm like you’re raising your hand,” the doctor instructed.

Obediently, I did as I was told.

After a few seconds, he turned to look at the nurse standing next to him and then met my gaze again quickly.

“Miss, are you aware that you have a lump in your breast?”

Those words. Those words. No one wants to hear them.

I was not aware of the growing tumor in my body because I hadn’t been checking for one. Why would I? I was 25 and healthy. Surely cancer wasn’t possible. Was this really happening?!

Within a week I had met with three more doctors. Needles poked me. Cold metal machines squished me. X-rays looked through me. I began to feel like a science experiment and I hated my body. It was betraying me just days before I was supposed to feel the most beautiful, donning couture garments from designers around the world.

After seeing doctor after doctor and changing hospitals to see “better” specialists, I learned that the oddly-shaped lump in my breast was benign, but growing, and needed surgical removal soon .

That surgery eventually happened. I went with my mom to the hospital in Georgetown and friends came from all over just to “be there.” Get-well cards and flowers piled up on my microscopic kitchen counter.

A few people told me that at some point, I would be happy for this, thankful even. Well, that didn’t sit well with me. It felt cruel: not only was I not supposed to be sad, I was supposed to be thankful?

I sometimes look back through my journal entries from those days of confusion. The tear-stained pages feel harder than the ones that follow. I realize that now I am different. And not only different, but better, and not only better, but thankful.

“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.” Psalm 107:1

Unless you live under a rock, you know that October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Although I didn’t have breast cancer, I understand how it feels to fear it.

Ladies, many of us forget to take the steps to detect the disease in its early stages. It is simply unacceptable that we are not getting checked or performing self-checks for lumps. No matter your age, please take my advice and even consider getting involved with a breast cancer awareness affiliate in your community.

By Nanama

There Are Only 4 Relationship Patterns — Which Is Yours?


Sound familiar?

I am usually found sipping a cup of coffee, while telling my readers that every romantic relationship is different.

And they are!

Maybe you and your boyfriend exclusively wear hats and speak in code.

Maybe the most romantic thing the two of you do is amateur plumbing together. That’s adorable .

Maybe you met heli-skiing and you enjoy wingsuiting together while yelling “I LOVE YOU” through the air.

I don’t know your life!

While every single romantic relationship is different in small ways, according to a new study on relationships there are just FOUR different types of patterns that every single relationship (successful or not) falls into.

At first, I kind of thought this was bullshit.

(Because I’m a jaded and skeptical Brooklynite)

But then I actually read the breakdown and was able to put every relationship I’ve been in one of the four categories.

Check them out and see if you agree!

If you do, excellent. If you don’t, I don’t know what to tell you.

Either way, knowing your relationship type is super important, especially if you’re just starting out.

Maybe you’ve decided that a dramatic relationship isn’t for you.

Then watch for the signs and can re-direct your energies toward the type of guy or relationship you really want.

Regardless, this info can be super helpful to help you fix problems with your love — or yourself!

1. Dramatic relationships

WeHeartIt

34% of the relationships studied fell into this category.

And be warned, it’s a bummer.

Dramatic relationships are those that characterized by having tons of changes in their commitment level.

You know the kind of relationship we’re talking about.

The one where you guys are all hot and heavy, but then “he needs space.”

Or, you go from being exclusive to opening things up, then back to exclusive when one of you freaks out with jealousy .

FUN TIMES.

Dramatic relationships are just that:

Dramatic!

The study found that couples in dramatic relationships were twice as likely to break up as couples in one of the other stages.

So keep that in mind the next time your BF says he wants to pump the breaks.

One time is fine, but is this a pattern? Can your heart take that?

2. Conflict-ridden relationships

WeHeartIt

12% of relationships studied fell into this category.

This one left a pit in my stomach, because I think (knock on wood) up until now, it’s the kind of relationship that I’ve fallen into.

Couples in conflict-ridden relationships can experience changes in their level of commitment, but it’s not as common.

It’s more likely that there are issues they don’t discuss that are holding them back from marriage or from making a bigger commitment.

Couples in conflict-ridden relationships can get stuck casually dating , or living together for years without making a decision about marriage.

It’s not because they don’t care about each other, it’s because there are issues that they know they need to work on if they ever want to move forward.

The study did show that conflict-ridden relationships are LESS likely to break-up, probably because in order to do that they would have to, you know, actually talk about what was going on with them both.

3. Socially-involved relationships

WeHeartIt

19% of couples studied fell into this category.

Socially-involved couples tend to make big decisions about their relationship depending on how their family and their friends see their significant other.

Like, you love your boyfriend, but you guys haven’t made a decision about moving in together because his mom isn’t crazy about you, or because you’re still waiting for your dad to stop shooting murder eye lasers at him.

I am 100% guilty of sometimes holding off on making relationship decisions because I care (maybe too much) what my family thinks!

Anyone else?

Socially-involved couples can move at a slower rate than other couples but also have a lower break-up rate.

4. Partner-focused relationships

WeHeartIt

30% of couples studied fell into this group.

Partner-focused relationships are, well, exactly what they sound like!

These relationships move forward at a steady consistent pace because the people in them are focusing their attentions on their partner, instead of on drama, ignoring conflict, or worrying about the opinions of other people.

Folks, this is here is the dream relationship pattern.

You want to be able to build something special with the person you love, and how else are you going to do that if you don’t focus on them and listen to them.

Of course, you should still have a life outside of your partner, but if you hope to make a long-term commitment, you’ve got to work with them to build it.

I love how every time I talk about building a relationship it kind of sounds like, labor intensive.

By Yussuf Mohamed sillah

15 Tips To Spice Up Your Sex Life (According To Men Who’ve Been In A Rut)


How to keep the sexy alive, whether you’ve been in a relationship for six months or 20 years.

It’s hard, especially if you’ve been a long-term relationship or marriage, to keep the sex interesting . It’s easy to fall into a rut when it comes to a romp in the bedroom — we’ve all done it — and harder than ever to come back out of the rut with some new sexy moves.

There’s no one better to discuss how to please a man then, well… another man. Here are 15 suggestions from guys for how to spice up your sex life and bring the heat back into your relationship.

1. Strap on some sexy stockings and a garter belt.

2. Keep your naughty bits well-maintained.

A simple trim can suffice if a bikini wax is an undesirable (ouch!) option.

3. Try a lap-dance or a sexy strip-tease.

That doesn’t mean you have to spend a fortune on lingerie — you can easily remove the frumpiest clothes sexily.

4. Sexy texts can really get him going.

Send him something like, “I can’t wait for you to get home tonight — got a surprise for you,” and, well, give him a surprise !

5. If you’re separated by many miles, try phone sex.

It may feel weird at first, but it can be wicked sexy if you go with it.

6. Try something new.

If your man isn’t someone who is loud in the bedroom , explore new territory with him.

7. Lose all your inhibitions.

Nothing revs a man up more than knowing that what he’s doing to you is driving you wild .

8. Guide him into doing what you like.

Take his hand and put it wherever you’d like it to go. Not only is this sexy for you, it’s a total turn-on for a guy.

9. Give him a handjob.

Just like women like a blended orgasm (more than one part of the vagina stimulated at the same time), men do, too. Try mixing up a handjob or a blowjob by playing with his testicles.

10. Talk dirty to him.

If you’re not used to it, it may feel WAY awkward, but the more you do it, the more second-nature it will become . And there’s a bonus! It may turn you on, too.

11. Bust out the sex toys .

Remember, they can be multipurpose. Use them to stimulate the shaft of the penis while giving a blowjob to bring him to new heights of orgasm.

12. Switch positions.

It’s easy to fall into the whole, “We have sex missionary style” or “I’m always on top,” but you may find yourself pleasantly surprised by new positions .

13. Make sex a surprise.

Put on his favorite pair of underwear and meet him at the door when he comes home from work. It’s certainly one way to spice up your sex life.

14. Join him in the shower.

No reason getting clean can’t come AFTER getting dirty.

15. Bring a bunch of pillows into the bedroom.

By Emoruwa Aderemi Kingsley

5 Ways To Get Your Partner In The Mood With a Condom


Instead of dreading condoms, here are five ways to add a little excitement to foreplay.

Every single part of sex should be fun. Yes, even the condom part.

Hey, all the more reason to spice things up in the bedroom right?

Here are a few of our favorite ways to integrate safe sex and birth control into your routine.

1. Role Play:

What man doesn’t love a “naughty nurse” night? Dress up in your medical best, and tell him he is due for a “check up”. Make it the grand finale (well, at least to the role playing part), and slip a condom on. Just make sure you are doing it right. Check out our condom sizing guide to make sure you get the right fit.

2. Try something new:

I know we say this often, but there are a lot of options out there. Why not be assertive and pick out the ones you want? At Lucky Bloke we have all the condoms you could ever dream of. We highly suggest a variety pack for your condom subscription. This way, each time is an adventure for both of you, and you are getting what you want out of it. Our Ultimate Condom Samplers come in: small, medium, large. Both partners getting theirs? Sounds like a perfect night to us!

3. Try it with foreplay:

For a lot of people, a condom seems “uncomfortable”. Change the thinking. Test out a few flavored condoms that both you, and your partner, will obviously love. Make it a part of your move to put it on before giving them a little below the belt action. We do however, recommend changing condoms before moving on to other sex acts as you can damage condom with your teeth!.

By Nelson ZANAHIN

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